


chase away these fears of mine

by tooruluvr



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Comfort/Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Pining, but what else is new, im sorry bb, oikawa tooru is pretty, pls read the notes!!, theres some iwaizumi angst in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-15
Updated: 2020-02-15
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:49:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22734358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tooruluvr/pseuds/tooruluvr
Summary: Anyone who knows Iwaizumi Hajime will tell you that it takes alotto scare him — but anything is possible when Oikawa Tooru is involved.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 30
Kudos: 507
Collections: Haikyuu Fanfiction Archive, kagsivity's fic archive





	chase away these fears of mine

**Author's Note:**

> out of all my haikyuu fic ideas of course it's the iwaoi fic that i manage to finish first. to the surprise of literally no one.  
> this started as a twitter fic thread but it got pretty long and i had to cut out descriptions because of the character limit so i thought writing it as a full fic would do it more justice!!
> 
> tw for a car crash scene + blood, please take care. if you want to skip it, you can start reading from _"It takes him several minutes to register what is happening..."_

Hajime and Tooru fight all the time.

It’s nothing new, and they’re pretty much known for it; their petty arguments and childish banter. They would bicker in class, in the gym, in the middle of matches, even — it’s just their thing, you could call it, and they often laugh about it with their friends later.

But they’ve never fought like this.

Not in the middle of the pavement, yelling at each other in ways they never have before as cars speed by. Hajime doesn’t even remember how he’d gotten here or what had started their fight to begin with — he only knows that he’s _unbelievably_ infuriated at Tooru, his skin feeling hot all over, and the more he looks at him the angrier he gets.

Tooru isn’t any kinder; his eyes have that fire in them which Hajime has seen before, but this bitter look was always directed at the people he considered his rivals. Prodigy setters and aces from powerhouse schools, _those_ types of people.

Never towards Hajime; never towards his childhood best friend.

Being pinned under that gaze feels suffocating, and it makes Hajime want to yell even louder.

“—if you’d stopped fussing over everything we wouldn’t be doing this right now!” Tooru is saying, his voice eerily sharp, void of its usual playful rhythm.

Although Hajime still has no idea how he’s here or how this mess all started, the words come out of his mouth without a second thought.

“Don’t try and slip out of this one, Oikawa! You might be used to getting away from your problems by blaming others, but that won’t work on me.”

“The only thing I want to get away from is your endless _pestering_ ,” Tooru bites back, his fists clenched and shaking by his sides.

“Fine!” Hajime snaps, venom in his voice, but it feels so wrong and leaves a harsh taste in his mouth.

Why are they doing this? How are they speaking with such cruelty to each other, in a way they never have before?

“If I’m bothering you so much,” Hajime continues, his body still fired up, “I’ll just leave. And don’t think I’ll look back for a second.” He doesn’t wait for a response, instead turns around and stalks away.

His skin feels hot, his palms clammy, and his brain is running a million miles an hour. He doesn’t know where he’s going, has no idea where he even is. All he knows is that he needs to _get away_.

In the blur of it all, Hajime doesn’t notice one crucial detail.

He’s stepped off the pavement, into the street, and all of a sudden there’s the frantic sound of a car horn somewhere to his left. He tries to run forward, but everything is happening so fast, he can’t move his body, his heart is throwing itself against his ribs, and _what is happening why can’t I move?!_

Behind him, there’s a bloodcurdling scream.

_“Hajime!”_

His body still frozen in place, Hajime can barely comprehend it when someone pushes him roughly, sending him falling to the ground. The gravel is harsh beneath him, and his palms sting where he’d tried to break his fall. 

In his frantic state, all he can do is look up and watch in suffocating horror as Tooru fails to escape the car speeding towards him — right where Hajime had been standing a mere second ago.

_“Tooru!”_

He watches, helpless, as his best friend is sent crashing to the ground, and his body remains limp and lifeless as blood pools around him on the road.

Hajime screams and screams and screams, and when he jolts awake, his body covered in a sheen of sweat and his heart thundering, he’s still screaming.

It takes him several minutes to register what is happening.

He’s in his bed, in his room; home. He looks around in a panic, his breaths rapid and heavy. It takes him longer than it should to finally convince himself that what he’d seen had been nothing but a dream — no, a nightmare. A _terrible_ one. 

Hajime rubs at his eyes and is shocked to find his cheeks tear-streaked.

Shakily, he whispers, “...What the fuck was that…?”

It takes him many more minutes to calm himself down. He leans back, breathing in and out several times and trying to stop himself from shaking. 

“It wasn’t real,” he whispers to himself. “It wasn’t real. We didn’t fight. There’s no car. Oikawa is safe.”

He has to repeat that last line multiple times.

Oikawa is safe. Oikawa is safe.

...Is he?

Hajime’s eyes settle on his phone on the nightstand, and after moments of deliberation, he reaches for it. It’s three in the morning...there’s no guarantee he’ll even be awake. But still.

His fingers still unsteady, he finds Oikawa’s name in his contacts list and presses the call button, putting it on speaker.

After five rings that seem to last a lifetime each, Oikawa picks up.

“Iwa-chan?” comes the familiar, smooth voice — if a bit groggy. “Why are you calling me so late?”

Hajime feels his body start to relax, and he sighs in relief as he lets Oikawa’s voice fill the room.

Oikawa is safe. Oikawa is safe.

“Iwa-chan?” he repeats. “Hellooo~?”

“Y-Yeah, I’m here,” Hajime says and inwardly curses himself for stumbling over his words. His voice sounds so fragile and he _hates_ it. He hears rustling on the other end of the line and knows that Oikawa has noticed. 

Well, he’s not exactly surprised. Very little can get past him, especially when it comes to Hajime.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, his voice more awake. “I mean, I know you miss me, but to call me in the middle of the night sounding like you’ve run a marathon?”

“I had a nightmare,” Hajime blurts, and immediately feels childish. Calling him because of something as ridiculous as a _nightmare_? Really? Is he eighteen or eight?

Oikawa, however, falls strangely silent for a moment, and when he speaks again his voice is unusually soft.

“...Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” Hajime bites his lip, hoping that will stop his voice from quivering. “Just...I mean, we—we were fighting pretty badly in it. And...you got hurt.” Memories of his dream are still vivid; they replay in his mind over and over and it’s like torture that was made specifically for him. It unnerves him just how clearly he remembers it, almost like it had actually _happened._

But...it hadn’t. It can’t have. Oikawa is still with him on the phone, after all.

He tries to say more, tries to brush it off like he knows he _should_ have from the start, but he can feel himself choking up again. God, he feels pathetic.

Oikawa doesn’t speak for a few moments.

“...Oh,” he finally says, and Hajime has no idea what to do with that until Oikawa follows it up with, “I’m coming over.”

“You—what?!”

“What are you sounding so surprised for?” Oikawa says, and the all-too-familiar whine in his voice is back. “You sound like you could use the company.”

“Oikawa, it’s three in the morning!”

“So? It’s not like we haven’t done this before.”

Which...well, Hajime can’t argue with that. They _have_ always done this — ever since they were snot-nosed kids with too much energy for their own good. It had started when they were seven years old, with Oikawa knocking excitedly on Hajime’s window until he’d let him in. He hadn’t wanted to sleep, and Hajime’s house was so closeby, and that was how they’d spent the majority of the night whispering excitedly until Hajime’s mom had found them out and sent Oikawa home.

Not like it had stopped them from doing it again, obviously; the next weekend, Oikawa’s mother was dumbfounded to have found Hajime and Oikawa sprawled on the floor, snoring and murmuring in their sleep.

It had become sort of like a tradition since then, and neither of them want to abandon it, as much as Hajime would like to insist otherwise.

“Don’t fall asleep before I get there, okay?” Oikawa says, and Hajime can hear the teasing smile in his voice. “Your prince in shining armour is coming!”

“It’s ‘knight’, and that is the last thing I’d describe you as.”

Oikawa says something, but his voice seems a little far from the phone and Hajime realises he must be putting some clothes on.

“...The window is unlocked,” Hajime says, resigned to his fate for the night.

Somehow, though, he doesn’t mind.

“As it always is~” Oikawa hums, and he thinks he’ll hang up now, but he doesn’t. And neither does Hajime.

Being left alone in the silence isn’t something he thinks he can handle right now.

And so they both stay on the phone, Oikawa rambling merrily about the first things that come to his mind. Hajime knows he’s doing this to keep him distracted, and God, does his heart swell.

He hears someone opening the window in his room a couple minutes later. Hajime hangs up and puts his phone away as Oikawa tumbles inside, all flailing limbs and no grace whatsoever.

“One would think you’d be better at this after all the times you’ve done it,” Hajime scoffs, if only to stop himself from saying something ridiculously cheesy and potentially embarrassing. In reality, seeing Oikawa in person is like a breath of fresh air. Somehow, his heart feels lighter now.

“It’s not my fault your window is small! I swear it was bigger before!” Oikawa complains, standing up and smoothing the wrinkles from his clothes. He’s wearing a shirt patterned with small spaceships and colourful aliens, and had Hajime been in a better state of mind he would have laughed. Oikawa and his stupid fascination with aliens. He’s never outgrown the obsession, and probably never will.

Hajime scoots over to the side as Oikawa walks over to his bed, claiming the spot he always has, right next to the nightstand.

“...Thank you for coming,” Hajime whispers, grateful that Oikawa is with him, here, in his room, safe and definitely not bleeding out on the road.

“Of course,” Oikawa says, like it’s the most obvious thing. “You always go on about me sleeping early, so I figured if you’re calling me this late, it must be important.” He puts a gentle hand on his shoulder, squeezing lightly. “...That dream hit you pretty hard, huh?”

“As annoying as you are,” Hajime grunts, “I definitely don’t want you getting hurt.”

_‘Especially not because of me,’_ dies on his lips.

“Aw, Iwa-chan, you really do care about me!” Oikawa coos, bubbly like a child on their birthday. “I always knew it.”

“Tooru,” Hajime says wearily, and the use of his first name catches Oikawa off-guard.

“Sorry,” he says, “Just trying to make you feel better.”

“I’m already better with you here,” Hajime admits, leaning into Oikawa ever-so-slightly. He feels an arm around him, pulling him closer. He rests his head on Oikawa’s shoulder, savouring his warmth.

“You always take care of me,” Oikawa murmurs, running his fingers through Hajime’s hair soothingly. “I guess it’s my turn now.”

A strange yet comforting sort of stillness overtakes Hajime; he lets Oikawa talk as much as he wants, thanking every star in every sky in the universe that he can still hear that sweet, silvery voice. Only Hajime gets to hear this tone of Oikawa’s — only his childhood best friend.

His breathing has steadied by now, and he no longer feels like his heart is trying to escape his chest. Eyes still closed, Hajime finds Oikawa’s hand and holds it; it’s his anchor to the world, keeping him from drifting away with his unsettling thoughts. Oikawa laces their fingers together, a silent reassurance.

“Come on,” He says softly after a while, gently nudging him further into the bed, “We should sleep.”

Hajime lifts his head, nodding. Oikawa slips off his shoes and lies down next to him, pulling the blanket over the two of them.

They’re close, much too close for any other pair of friends, maybe — but not for them. It feels like they’ve always been this way, putting their absolute trust in each other without a moment’s thought. Oikawa arms encircle Hajime’s waist and Hajime looks up at him, his hand drifting to his friend’s cheek.

His eyes can’t seem to leave his face, wanting to memorise every inch of it even though over the years he already has — but the dream has left him with disturbing images of Oikawa’s face ashen and his eyes glassy, and he desperately wants to commit _this_ face to memory, the one just a breath away from him. The softness of his skin, the faint pink flush of his cheeks, the eyelashes framing the deepest brown eyes he has ever seen.

Eyes which, gratefully, are not glaring at him with the heat of a blazing fire, as his nightmare had shown him.

_‘Don’t you dare hurt yourself for me,’_ Hajime thinks. _‘Don’t you ever. I’ll never forgive you.’_

“Iwa-chan?” Oikawa says, arching an eyebrow at him curiously. “I know I’m stunning, but, really…”

“Will you keep quiet for once?”

“Hajime,” Oikawa murmurs, and every word on Hajime’s tongue vanishes. “I’m not hurt. It was a dream, remember? I’m here.”

Maybe Hajime isn’t as subtle as he thinks. Though Oikawa is also an excellent observer.

“It just…” he bites his lip. “It felt so _real._ I couldn’t...I wasn’t even sure if it hadn’t actually happened when I woke up.”

“It didn’t,” Oikawa affirms. “I’m still here, as amazing as ever, and definitely not hurt, so you can relax.”

He pulls him closer, rubbing his back soothingly. Hajime buries his nose in the crook of his neck, his lips just barely brushing the skin.

“Iwa-chan is so cute,” Oikawa chirps, “Worrying about me like that. Ah, I feel so loved.”

“...I hope you know that if it weren’t for the circumstances, I would have hit you.”

“Then I’ll say it as long as I can! You’re so cute, Iwa-chan! So, so cute!”

Hajime’s ears burn. “Shut up.”

Oikawa laughs, and the sound is so overwhelming it almost makes Hajime pull away. Almost.

He takes a deep breath, feeling his limbs grow heavier as Oikawa murmurs comforting words, reassuring him that he’s here, he’s safe.

_‘Oikawa is safe,’_ Hajime repeats in his mind, this time with little doubt. _‘Tooru is safe.’_

When sleep starts to overcome him, Hajime murmurs a soft, “Good night, Tooru,” closing his eyes as he feels his fears fading away.

“Good night, Hajime.”

When Hajime wakes up the next morning, it takes a couple seconds for him to recall the events of the night before. Oikawa is still fast asleep, clinging to him like he won’t let go — and truth be told, Hajime doesn’t want him to.

Slowly, he pulls away just enough to be able to see his face. The early morning glow begins to slowly fill the room, caressing his skin gently and making the top of his brown hair golden, almost like a halo. His expression is peaceful, and the corners of his lips are turned up in a subtle smile. It’s becoming a little difficult to breathe, suddenly.

_‘At least one of us seems to be having good dreams,’_ Hajime thinks.

He brushes strands of hair out of Oikawa’s eyes, and before he can change his mind, leans in to softly press his lips to the corner of his mouth.

“Scaring me, even in my dreams…” Hajime murmurs, shaking his head as he smiles to himself, “really, you’re such a pain.”

Oikawa begins to stir, his eyes fluttering open, and in that moment the light catches the colour in them _just right_ — like the sun shining through honey, sweet and soft in a way Hajime has never seen before. God, he really wasn’t thinking straight when he’d made that call at three in the morning, was he?

“...You seem a lot better,” Oikawa says, breaking the spell, though it’s almost back when he gives him a lazy smile. “No more nightmares, I take it?”

Hajime pauses and meets his gaze, and deep down he knows that no matter how many nightmares try to haunt him in his sleep, there is nothing that can take this moment away from him.

“No.” Hajime whispers.

_‘Not with you here.’_

**Author's Note:**

> you can just tell how much i love writing iwa and oikawa saying each other's first names :')  
> as always thank you for reading and if you ever want to scream about iwaoi feel free to dm me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/tooruluvr)!! they are my #1 comfort ship.


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